The Power of Beliefs: Why they feel Unshakable and How to Rewrite Them
The power of belief, it can either hold you back or move you forward.
Molly sat outside the sandstone gallery, its grand columns rising above her like silent judges. Her hands gripped the steering wheel so tightly her knuckles were white, her palms damp and slick as though the wheel might slip from her grasp. She stared at the glass doors. Doors she had once dreamed of walking through, and now they glared back at her like an unforgiving spotlight.
Inside, her closest friends moved quickly, arranging canvases and straightening frames, their voices carrying in bursts of laughter that drifted out like warm air from a home she wasn’t sure she belonged in. To anyone else, it was just an exhibition being set up. To Molly, it felt like the line between the life she longed for and the one she feared she could never claim.
Her chest tightened, heavy as a stone sinking in water. Instead of the excitement she had imagined, dread pressed down on her ribs, stealing her breath and whispering the same old refrain: “I don’t belong here. They’ll see right through me.”
It wasn’t the first time Molly had pulled back from an opportunity. On the surface, it looked like procrastination or nerves. But underneath was something much deeper: a belief she had carried since childhood, reinforced by countless moments, a belief that she wasn’t enough.
That afternoon, Molly stayed in the car. It was only a trial run, just the set-up, but the thought of walking inside left her frozen. In two days’ time, the gallery would open its doors to the public, and she knew she couldn’t keep letting this belief win. That’s when Molly knew she had to do something about it.
You’ve probably had a “Molly moment” of your own. Maybe you’ve stopped yourself from speaking up in a meeting because you believed you weren’t as smart as the others. Or you’ve delayed pursuing something close to your heart because you were certain you’d fail.
When a Thought Becomes a Belief
Beliefs are thoughts that have been repeated so often, and backed up with enough “evidence,” that they start to feel like absolute truth.
They’re the quiet, unquestioned convictions that shape how you see yourself and the world.
Psychologists describe this as the self-fulfilling prophecy: what you believe influences your behaviour, which then influences your outcomes (Merton, 1948; Rosenthal & Jacobson, 1968).
If you believe you’ll stumble, you hold back, play small, and create results that confirm that belief.
If you believe you’re capable, you’re more likely to rise to the challenge and prove yourself right.
Same situation. Different belief. Completely different outcome.
Where Our Beliefs Begin
Most beliefs take root early in our life.
You weren’t born thinking you weren’t good enough. You learned it through repeated experiences and messages from parents, teachers, culture, or peers.
The brain wires in what’s repeated and emotionally charged a process known as Hebbian learning: neurons that fire together, wire together (Hebb, 1949).
Over time, those repeated stories become mental shortcuts. They stop feeling like “just beliefs” and start feeling like absolute truth.
Why Beliefs Feel Unshakable
Once you’ve absorbed a belief, your brain works hard to protect it. Psychologists call this cognitive consistency (Festinger, 1957), the desire to keep our inner world aligned.
This is why you can walk into a room full of smiles and only notice the one frown.
Your mind is constantly filtering reality to match your beliefs, a bias known as confirmation bias (Nickerson, 1998).
That’s why even unhelpful beliefs can feel unshakable, they’ve been repeated, reinforced, and filtered until they seem like facts.
Molly’s Turning Point
When Molly came to work with me, we began to gently unravel these beliefs. We looked at the stories holding her back.
She practiced catching them in action, asking herself, “Is this true or just familiar?”
She started looking for evidence that challenged the old story, rehearsed new, more supportive beliefs, and visualised herself walking confidently into that gallery.
Two nights later, Molly was back in the car, this time for opening night. Her chest still fluttered with nerves, but alongside the excitedness was a steadier voice: “I can handle this.”
She opened the door, stepped into the gallery, and felt something shift. People weren’t there to expose her, they were there because they genuinely wanted to see her art.
For the first time, she allowed herself to enjoy the experience. She answered questions, connected with visitors, and let herself be seen.
By the end of the evening, she hadn’t just displayed her work, for everyone to see, she had sold her very first piece.
Same situation. Different belief. Completely different outcome.
How You Can Begin Shifting a Belief
Here’s the good news: beliefs are not fixed. Thanks to neuroplasticity, the brain’s ability to change its wiring, old beliefs can be challenged and reshaped (Doidge, 2007).
The first step in rewriting an unshakable belief is noticing it in action. You can’t change what you don’t notice.
Catch the belief in action.
Listen for the quiet phrases that run through your mind: I can’t… I’m not enough… I’ll fail.
Ask: is this true, or just familiar?
Beliefs often stick because they’re old, not because they’re true.
Look for disconfirming evidence.
What in your life points to a different story? Even one example begins to loosen the grip.
Practice a new belief.
Choose something you want to strengthen, like “I can handle this,” or “I belong here.” Repeat it, act on it, and anchor it in emotion.
Be patient.
Shifting beliefs is like strengthening a muscle. Small, consistent practice makes all the difference.
The Freedom That Comes From Changing Your Belief
Beliefs run deep. Left unexamined, they quietly shape how much of yourself you allow into the world. But when you begin to see them as patterns rather than facts, everything changes.
Molly’s moment at the gallery didn’t erase every doubt, but it cracked the armour of “I don’t belong.” And once you see the crack, light gets in.
That’s the power of belief, the same thought that once kept you frozen can, when rewritten, open the door to freedom.
So let me ask you: what beliefs are shaping your life right now? And are they the ones you want to keep?
If you’ve noticed that old beliefs are holding you back, you don’t have to untangle them alone.
I offer a free 20-minute call where we can explore what’s coming up for you and what’s possible on the other side. You can book your call here